an old ninja proverb:
when 2 ninja’s where sat in a bar, drink japanese beer . the earth then shakes. the newly turned ninja turns to sempai and asks “why did you shake my chair?”
to which the sempai replied ” i did not it was an earthquake you prat.”
This teaches although you progress to enlightenment. you may still need to have you feet solidly planted to the earth .
Well one night in the Ninja training hall, a lecture was been given , into the spiritual world of the Ninja.
As the lecture continued it began to cover the concept that positive and negative thoughts can effect the out come of a given situation. For example if you had a box that was closed but contained the out come a situation. Then as you open the box what you perceive gives the contents of the box its outcome.
example if you had a matchbox that held light in it . and the light can either be seen as a packet of light or a wave. When the match box is open the viewer sees it as packet whereas another viewer could see it as a wave
at which point the newly turned ninja puts his had up and asks “But whats in the matchbox?” The Ninja master answers “Nothing for the Light has been released and the out come of how it exists is now defined by the viewer.” . “But Where are the Matches though !!!” Replies the newly turned ninja.
The moral is when you define a conceptual matchbox ensure you nkow where you put your conceptual matches
Now it being a very japanese art . When two ninjas of high respect meet to fight or demostrate some pattern works they will bow to each other in the traditional and depending on whether it is a fight or for demostration purposes they may speak as well.
So picture the seen our newly turned ninja and his sempai meet up within 3 mat distance (6ft) bend onthe left knee to bow and both utter the phrase, but this time something is different . There is an unusual slience in the air and the voice from one side of the room says “ote yawara kanni”.
from the other side comes “Ok you want a curry”
the moral is never practise bad japanese or you will get a serious kicking
Back at the old Ninja training camp it was shuriken jutsu practise. the art of chucking pens and pencils at cardboard,
pete: As the trainee ninjas got the 3 bo shuriken (yes proper bo) {pencil shaped not the “ninja stars”} to stick firmly into the cardboard door. they would be able to progress up to the next stance.
stance 1 standing
stance 2 kneeling
stance 3 back to door, turn and throw.
So once Haru the great white ninja (some say it is so) reaches the forth stance. He asks Sensei to demostrate the stance . So Sensei runs towards the doors and throws the shuriken . runs back and does it 2 more times. Haru bows and takes the postion form which to begin running from .
Haru sets of , legs it down the path an bowls the the shuriken at which point it hits the door and flies out at a diagonal. as Haru runs into the door.
he runs back to the start with sensei saying throw then step
haru nods and begins his run again . as he gets to the point he steps then throws this time the shuriken miss stabing him inthe foot and there is a slight titter from the rest of the ninja clan
third time now haru begins chanting “throw , step ” in his mind.
off he sets our plucky trainee ninja, as he gets to the throw point he runs throws steps and runs into the wall as the shuriken pass him coming back in the opposite direction.
sensei says “Haru the idea is to the throw the shuriken not googly it”
Moral once you have learnt cricket it takes time and paitence to learn to throw shuriken.
The idea of training is to make an action a reaction that takes no thought. So the best way is to run through the action till your happy then get your partner to talk to you.
So as you are working your way there the 5 count boxset or the 3 of 9 tapping drill. Your partner will ask you maths question . So Sempai dodgy was training with Ninja Master Forest. Sempai ask what 4 + 6 * 34 was to which Ninja Master Forest replied FISH.
This shows that action of the word fish effects Ninja in a way which no other word can. As you will often find a student of the haru dojo will randomly shout fish for no reason when asked a question
Renshi wood is an interesting character in the ninja world , for once a trainee ninja met him at a seminar, and his opening words where profound. Never blow on your grandma cock
When talking about living in Brighton Ninja Master Forest spoke about times about being chatted up be lady of dubious biology. Then ask but hasn’t every bloke . To which sempai dodgy replied no only you NM Forest
Everyone these days has heard of Hanzo Hatitori as being a maker of swords but few are aware of his ability to come back from the dead
It was a spring morning the sun was pouring through the blinds Ninja Master Forest woke up with a start, it felt like his foot was becoming wet. As he moved the bed cover he found Hanso the Ninja master of old Reincarnated as a mongarl dog showing his foot that he really was a master of the sword and that Forest’s foot was a bitch in comparisson.
Old saying is if you have a dog you do not want to breed with your foot one must thunder clap with bricks
Re – incarnation is something that happens, but what also happens is karma. Take for example the Roman Athanlonious, this Rich roman was not one to keep with technology. but his wife Uleeann eventually convinced him to buy a state of the art Chariot.
Which he did and boy did he love it and take care off it.
One day as he was going a long the Roman roads or to romans they where roads. He was watching the scenery as he went on his journey.
He heard a cry from the road when he turn and looked it was to late he had crashed into a party of Druids and had kill 4 of them. He was arrested for his crimes and centre to the circus to become a Gladiator. Of which he should an apttiude for. But sadly was crushed by a Ginger Mence.
NOw you must be thinking that poor old Athanlonious had paid for his driving with out due care and attention. but sadly Karma is not like that and can span 3 milliona . For 4 years into the 21st century Ninja Master Forest is bought a car second hand by his famliy to help ensure him work and mobility.
Sadly as karma works in nasty ways the garage was the same place as to where the accident had happened some 3000 yrs past. The car worked fine for a while but Forest was a forgetful man often the phone would ring to tell him his light were left on. #
(16:01:56) pete: This was when karma kicked it, that battery became drained and Sempai dodgy had to come round with his recharger to fix it usually when Forset was running late for an appointment .
This carried on for a while then on a trip back to Chester from portsmouth the car blew up. And had to be scrapped . So he borrowed more money for enough car that one had the gear box fall out . The car was fixed and as he left the garge the was a load thunk and the car would not move . The chain timing mechanism had broken so the car was a write off
His lovely caring gran had a car . and she offered it to her favourite grandson . So of went Forest to get the car. He arrived in portsmouth and spent time seeing the famliy , then the next day he got himself insured on his grans car and drove it a mile down the road. But karma was not impressed and the Car stopped working. Ah but senior forest was a mechanic . And he set about the car trying to fix it. But when Karma has a mindset boi does it have a mindset. so sadly this was a right off as well
eventaully Forest got another car from his caring family that he had issues with. Yet they still cared for him and he got a white 100 rover. And life trundled on nicely the car behaved it self and karma had been appeasd although Forest was not mechanical minded and had not seen that the fuel tank had been fitted with an anti tamper device. So when he filled up at a garage he did not notice the fuel pour out over the car and on to the forecourt.
he spotted it and put a bit of sand down and told a pump attendant, but as ever he was in a rush . so he had to go and left but the garage was shut by the fire service as the risk of fire was high
: but he left chester and went to ellesmere port . and life ran smoothly will one night the police knocked on the door as some one had been seen trying to set fire to it . and had been hitting the engine to start. it a so this car was scrapped also .
He no longer has a car. but note he went through 4 cars in 6months
